"more"

This past week I attended a Writing Institute with some colleagues from the Blue Springs School District. Honestly, I dreaded attending. I wasn't looking forward to giving up 4 days of my summer and I didn't love the idea of getting up and "ready" to get out the door in the morning (I had to be there at 9:00, so I shouldn't be complaining!). I figure this is what being grown-up is all about, making yourself do things because you should and in the end you know it will be a great experience. And in the end it was better than a great experience. I learned so much about myself as a writer and share a special connection with teachers at my school (and other schools) that I will forever cherish. I am grateful for the opportunity to attend and I am glad that my parents instilled values in me to attend things because you should because one may end up LOVING the experience. I hope that someday Paxton can have the same understanding. With all that being said, during the Writing Institute we were required to publish a personal narrative. I chose to write about a small moment between Paxton and I that happened recently. Since it was a special moment that Pax and I shared I also want to share it on the blog, so that someday he can read it.

A funny, unforgetable moment that happend at the Writing Institute. A bird pooped on me, literally. It pooped on my writing piece, new writers notebook and sleeve. Hopefully it's not a sign that my writing is 'poopy!'

My writing piece...

It's our nightly ritual. We've done it since you were born. Each night after I've read aloud to you and you've sucked down the last drop of milk, I take the palm of your hand and trace a circle inside the palm of your hand and recite, "My love for you goes round and round." Then, I stop tracing the inside of your hand and push my pointer finger inside the center of your palm and exclaim, "My love never stops! It goes wherever you go even up to your nose!" I tickle my fingers up your forearm and tap your nose. Most nights a giggle emerges from behind your "binkafier" and I lay you in your crib. However, last night was different. Last night I did it to you and instead of just a smile with delight, you signed 'more!' When you made that symbol with your hands it was as if you were returning love to me. As if we were connecting and you wanted more of the warm feeling. It was like you said I love you back. It was like you promised your love to me forever.
How is it that simple acts such as Pax signing 'more' stay with me for days and make my heart ooze with love? I know it helps me get through the tougher "moments" when Pax doesn't nap all day or opens and shuts the kitchen cabinet doors or pushes the buttons on the dishwasher 7 times even though I tell him numerous time not to. In those moments I think back to the connection we share during our nightly ritual and I can be more patient, understanding and loving.